Shit on a Shingle

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When I first saw you sitting there
In the street flat on your derrière
One with the mud
Covered in crud
I thought, “How nasty is she.”
But after a few pints knocked back
My longing just picked up the slack
And now I can say
This fact, clear as day,
That lovin’ you tastes just as good
As shit on a shingle!

Some might claim my taste is shot
Or I’m out of my mind.
Some might say you taste like snot
Or have a loose behind.
They’d find you more appealing
Given the chance to mingle –
Which is why I say you are
My little shit on a shingle.

I tried my hardest to get you to bathe
And you foil my attempts to get you to shave
Your teeth are all crooked
Your low voice is shooked
And I’d have it no other way.
All the fellas’ heads turn as you pass
Cause your vocabulary is crass
But your beer gut jiggle
And your idiot giggle
Remind me that you’re just as tasty
As shit on a shingle!

I sometimes feel I second-guess
How much lee you weigh
And see my life is a real big mess
When you steal away my day.
But there are moments that make it better
To be with you than single –
And there are far worse things to eat
Than shit on a shingle!

Yeah, babe, you’re a vagrant at heart
As am I if you couldn’t tell
Which explains why
We shouldn’t try
To bite off more than we chew.
So I’ll give up what I thought I wanted,
Content to settle on being taunted,
For they don’t understand
How a plain starving man
Would count himself lucky to, morning and night,
Eat nothing but shit on a shingle!

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